A List of Thoughts from My Seventh Month of Motherhood

A list of thoughts from my seventh month of being a mother.

What do I say when someone says she's so cute? Do I say thank you? I mean, I didn't really have any control over it so I don't feel like I should take credit for it. Do I say, "Oh I know, she is!"? That seems..bad? What do I say?? Don't get me wrong, I love and appreciate when people say that. I just never know how to respond!

I don't always wash my pump parts. And I mix different temperatures of milk together. And I use milk that's been thawed for more than 24 hours. I break a lot of breastmilk-related rules. But everyone seems fine so apparently the rules aren't all that necessary.

I did the cliché mom thing where I got a bunch of my hair cut off. I have no regrets.

Motherhood makes me feel like I should be better. Notice I didn't say it makes me WANT to be better, I just feel like I should be. I should watch less tv, read more, model good behavior, show her by example what a good person does. Ugh. It seems like so much work. And I really like yelling at people in the car.

I hate spit up even more now than I used to because she does it less often so I'm not expecting it and it's a terrible, smelly surprise.

I love our pediatrician. Like, a lot. I love her so much that, after Leo's 6 month appointment Ben turned to me and said, "Please don't leave me for Dr. Agan."

Sometimes people find out that Leo sleeps 12-13 hours a night and say things like "You're so fortunate!" and "Oh you really lucked out!" I find that insulting because I worked REALLY hard to get her to sleep well. There were lots of books and articles and podcasts and crying and praying and effort involved in getting her to sleep 12 hours a night. We are very lucky because she's a great, trainable baby, but she was still trained. By me. And it was hard. I'd like appropriate credit. Do you think she gives me any? No. So far I haven't heard one thank you out of her. So I need it from everyone else.

Weight Watchers works for me. Sometimes I feel silly telling people I do it because I hate the commercials and I don't want to be associated with Oprah yelling "I LOVE BREAD!" but it definitely works (for me). Plus I can eat ice cream as long as I eat chicken and vegetables the rest of the day and that's the kind of balance I need in my life.

Leo giggles all the time now and it's hilarious. She giggles at the puppies, she giggles at her toys, she giggles at me when I'm trying to feed her. I love it so much. Her giggles are the best.

Leo is finally starting to eat real food. She doesn't actually eat it, but she rubs it on her face near her mouth. Occasionally some gets in. It's funny to watch.

On a related note, the dogs have finally realized the baby is worth it. They eat all the food she throws on the ground. They freak out when she gets in her high chair because they know snacks are coming and they're too excited to handle it. This is what they've been waiting for the last 6 months. This is their reward for 6 months of moderate neglect and "Don't lick the baby!" scolds. They seem happy with the trade.

I still hate breastfeeding. One of my friends said that Ben should buy me a present after a year of doing it as incentive to keep it up. Ben agreed. This is now my primary motivator for continuing breastfeeding.

I think my body is finally going back to normal. Not just the weight part (although that's finally starting to come off which makes me happy) but post-pregnancy my body was just weird. My ribs were bigger and my organs were all displaced. But I feel like they're starting to reposition themselves back in their original homes and that's nice.

Having a baby is fun. I'm afraid to ever have another one because I might not like it as much as I like this one.